A Look Back
I really hate when it is time to sleep and that is when my thoughts turn to Scott. Sometimes the only way to get the thoughts to stop is to get up and write them out – so that is what I am doing now. I have been thinking a lot lately of when I had to tell Jaelyn that her daddy had died. That was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. Those few words just tore apart life as she had known it. I remember the inadequacy of words and not really knowing now to say it. The difficulty of pushing those words through my lips is something I will never forget. I still cry when I think of that moment. When I think back to the hours after Scott’s death, I’m amazed at how together I was, getting through and doing what needed done. Calling friends to break the news and hearing the disbelief and shock on the other end of the phone and I struggled to keep myself together. Talking with the funeral home was concrete and something that I actually knew what to expect because of part